Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
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