don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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