Did you just see the Batmobile???
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
