If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize