the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
