they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
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