I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
