soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
He felt like a one man threesome
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
