I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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