i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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