Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
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