Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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