she smelled like a LAN party
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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