I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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