last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
