so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
