i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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