Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
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woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
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I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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