I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize