end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize