I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
