R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Porn is love you can see.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
