you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
