Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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