ADVERTISEMENT

• (206): View more from Washington

  remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?

  (206): View more from Washington

  joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!

  Fav 13 2325 906

  share tweet
  

• (916): View more from California

  If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes

  Fav 14 1155 3549

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (315): View more from New York

  You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.

  Fav 16 6611 935

  share tweet
  

• (913): View more from Kansas

  she is the kim kardashian of front butts

  Fav 23 870 6104

  share tweet
  
• 

  These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (910): View more from North Carolina

  The strip club called, they have your shoe.

  Fav 13 4061 1135

  share tweet
  

• (517): View more from Michigan

  I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.

  Fav 19 1186 2276

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (303): View more from Colorado

  His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.

  Fav 8 3887 1283

  share tweet
  

• (618): View more from Illinois

  She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed

  Fav 9 1265 1665

  share tweet
  

• (303): View more from Colorado

  Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.

  Fav 19 2506 920

  share tweet
  
• 

  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater

  Fav 3 664 951

  share tweet
  

• (304): View more from West Virginia

  Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03

  Fav 3 541 856

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (913): View more from Kansas

  The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?

  (1-913): View more from Kansas

  Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....

  Fav 1 729 554

  share tweet
  

• (989): View more from Michigan

  I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.

  Fav 0 467 400

  share tweet
  

• (425): View more from Washington

  I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.

  Fav 1 395 124

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (314): View more from Missouri

  He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later

  Fav 2 100 6

  share tweet
  

Randomize