At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
