SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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