So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
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