You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles