Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Randomize