That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
I did not marry a roomba.
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