I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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