whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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