Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
