My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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