As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
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last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
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Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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