Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
