She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
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