Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
