Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
