just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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