DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Randomize
