am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
