I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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