yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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