I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
