take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
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Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
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I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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