WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
