we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
