Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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